Sugar Coma Foxtrot
by BiteWorseThanBark
Summary: The journey of the Judge and his feline companions is abruptly halted by an interference on the monorail's tracks. Investigation reveals a body and another cat that has been tailing them throughout zone 3. "Let's tango!" A humble adaption of the Jozlyn battle in Felix's spinoff of OFF titled HOME. T to be safe.


**A/N:** As a quick note, I see the modes Auto and Manual (Attack) as being distinctly characterised during battle.

In Manual, seeing as you, the Puppeteer, is commanding each character's individual actions- perhaps taking time to find that right competence or necessary item- the movements of the characters are more controlled and robotic with a slower reaction time.

Automatic, however, is when the characters- left to fight based on their own whims- are faster, more fluid and even more creative in the execution of attacks. The downside to this being their reckless, oft times idiotic decisions in attack. Sans those with a competence, healing also poses an issue.

Thus, as you will see in this fic, unless the need to heal is severe, the Puppeteer has pretty much permanently selected Automatic mode.

Hopefully that will erase any confusion.

(Also, sorry that I have to use brackets for Jozlyn's angry emoticons. Greater and less than symbols don't work because FF is a douche muffin like that. :,L )

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_Everybody on this side of fanfiction knows I don't own **OFF**, for it is **Mortis Ghost's** bizarrely beautiful creation. _

_For those that are not aware, the **OFF** spinoff titled **HOME**, the characters **Alain** and **Jozlyn** and the boss theme **Sugar Coma Foxtrot **are the creations of **Felix (thejudge on Tumblr) and his absolutely amazing team**. _

_If you haven't played it, then I highly reccommend that you do so. __**Please give them all your support! ** _**=-)**

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**Sugar Coma Foxtrot**

"..."  
The monorail's sudden halt did not by any means appear to amuse the Batter. His already stern features were further furrowed with annoyance at the delay to his purifying schedule.  
Taking note of this, zone 0's feline guardian, the Judge, spoke up. "Worry not, man of sporty origins. We shall check the exterior of this monorail for you."  
The Batter grunted and slouched into his seat. "Fine. But don't take too long."  
"Of course," purred Pablo. Then, inclining his head towards the door, he led the way out onto the tracks. His feline companions, Alain and Valerie followed close behind.

It was dark on the tracks, but the trio's feline eyes easily adapted to the difference in lighting. As he was leading the procession, Judge was the first to see both the source of the stopped tram- a body- as well as a blur of pale fur that he had earlier seen on at least two or three other occasions. The creature darted into a small door set into the side of the tunnel and out of view.  
The trio stared warily at the dark entrance, a ladder propped against it for easy access.  
It was with great effort that Pablo tore his eyes away from the hole to stare at the corpse blocking the path. Red pooled from the Elsen, soaking the tracks in stickiness. Zone 0's guardian frowned. "What was he doing on the monorail?" He wondered aloud.  
"It matters not," Alain spoke up with his usual rasping hiss of a tone. "We ought to investigate that hole in the wall."  
Valerie shifted his weight nervously. "But the Batter-"  
"Can wait," interrupted the stray. "Do you not agree, Judge?"  
Pablo nodded. "Indeed. Exercising patience would do the purifier much good. Besides, I admit that I am rather curious about this enigma of a feline that has been stalking us throughout this blasted zone."  
"Enough dilly dallying then. Let us move."

Careful to keep noise to a minimum, the trio slunk up the ladder and into the hole. On the other side was a dark, spacious room with assorted knick knacks and furniture pushed mostly against the back wall. It was empty of life, save for the very fluffy behind of the one they were tailing.  
Either hearing a noise or sensing their presence, the feline jumped in surprise, hurriedly turning to face them. Green eyes widened with fear took them all in. Recognition then flickered within their depths and the cat relaxed marginally.  
"Why have you been following me?" Queried the feline, whose voice identified as female. "Do you have a gift for me? :3" Her feather duster of a tail wagged excitedly at this prospect. "Who knows?! Either way, here we are, face to face."  
Silence descended as the three males exchanged bewildered looks.  
The female quickly broke it with a string of more excitedly babbled sentences. "I can see it in your eyes. You just so happen to be very confused. Oh, and I'm still waiting for that gift. You did remember to bring me flowers and candy, right?"  
Being the first to recover from the initial shock, Judge answered slowly, "Neither of your stated assumptions are true."  
The female blinked. "Ohh... So why exactly are you following me? Are you going to eat me?" Her ears flattened against her skull slightly. "Your fangs are quite big. I may eat sugar and meat, but I promise I don't taste good. Trust me. I've bit my own paws before... twice. It didn't taste good. 3:"  
Pablo gave her an odd look, unsure of what he should say in such a bizarre situation.  
"This loony one has had too much of the sweet crystal." Hissed Alain. This was rather rich, coming from one who had consumed an entire room of sugar mere minutes ago. "Let's just go back to the monorail car. Forget this ditzy female."  
"I'm neither loony nor ditzy!" Growled the female. A dangerous glint reflected in her eyes as her smile became a menacing one. "I'll show you. ):3"  
"Pablo," the Judge's brother tucked his tail between his legs, "she's scaring me..."  
Said scary female pounced straight at the trio. "Let's tango!"

Hastily, they dodged, scrabbling further into the dark room.  
The female turned around, tail twitching, and fury burning within her jade eyes. The idea of three opponents did not appear to phase her in the slightest. On the contrary, it fired her up even more.  
"Huff! Puff! I'm tough! I'll teach you all! 3:(" She declared, teeth bared in an angry grimace and pelt fluffing with aggression. Alain gave a cynical snort at the display.  
"What can one such as you hope to do to against the three of us?"  
"Wait, Alain," Valerie said nervously. "I do not believe we should provoke her."  
"Too late~!" Sang their opponent.

Right away, her paws tapped frantically against the ground, closing the distance between herself and the three males quickly as she danced to a very unorthodox tune playing in her head only. It made it difficult to discern which direction she was heading towards. Thus, the heroic trio was incredibly confused. In comparison, she was a graceful blur of fur and claws that inflicted immense pain.  
Blood, mingled hisses and pained yowls followed the attack.  
"Why you...!" Snarled Alain. "I will put you in your place!" He shot towards the lone female before Judge's exclamation of halt was issued, giant teeth aching to rip the ditzy female to shreds.  
She giggled at him, sidestepping his first swipe.  
"I don't need putting anywhere. I'm fine where I am, thank you. :3"  
An annoyed hiss from the rat toothed feline. "Shut up and be still!" Another swipe countered by a dodge. This time however, there was a follow through attack. Alain reeled away, cursing and pawing at his slashed face.  
"I told you I was tough!" The female exclaimed proudly, quickly dancing back a few paces when Alain swiped at her again. He snarled an obscenity at her giggling face and staggered back to his companions.

"Why are you fools standing there when you could have helped me press the attack?"  
"Because, my dear reckless accomplice, a large measure of strategy is needed against this opponent. She is swift and unorthodox. A frightening combination." Answered Judge, tail swishing. "Charging at her completely on the offensive on a whim is foolish." He gave the other cat a pointed look. Alain huffed. "What is it you suggest we do then? Allow the ditzy female to dance until she tires?"  
"Perhaps."  
"Well I suggest another plan, because by the looks of it, she's far too hyped on sugar and her own stupidity for that to work."  
"Brother. Alain." Valerie spoke up. "We should delay and leave ourselves vulnerable to attack no further. It is dangerous."  
"You are, of course, correct, my dear sibling. We shall employ hit and run tactics, much like our adversary displayed during her brief skirmish with Alain, to drive her to defeat."  
Aforementioned feline grumbled to himself and begrudgingly agreed it was a good course of action. The brother also nodded his assent.  
"Stupendous!" Grinned Judge. "We appear to be in for another fearsome display of offence, so let us immediately implement this strategy. Divide yourselves from my position and exploit our advantage in the numerical!"

Valerie and Alain immediately fanned out, the former wasting no time by initiating a feint. The trio's over-eager opponent fell for it, receiving teeth in her shoulder as punishment. She yowled something fierce and squirmed under the unyielding vice of Valerie's jaws. Whilst she was pinned, Alain and Judge each nailed her with a competence attack, sending her into a state of further frenzy.  
With a screech, the female buried her teeth into Valerie's hunch. He withdrew his own and scratched her across the forehead. Her flinch gained him his freedom and he limped away quickly. On cue, Alain pounced on the other cat, pinning her. Hissing, he performed a Leeching Palpitate, which injured her whilst healing his own wounds, followed by a swipe across the face.  
Beneath him, the she-cat scrabbled frantically. Green eyes wide and teeth bared in a long, drawn out hiss, she kicked and scratched at the other cat, desperate for freedom. This, however, caused more annoyance than massive harm.

Desperate, the female chanced a snapping of jaws at her aggressor's face. The feint worked. Alain was flipped onto bottom tier and the tables were turned. His own medicine was now being doled out with twice as much claw shaped fury.  
If not for Judge's intervention in the form of a body slam, the stray from zone 1 might very well have found his face a messy pile of minced meat and bloodied fur tufts.  
Hissing, the she-cat snapped at the sophisticated male's face. The attack was countered with Pablo's own, bigger, canines. Both sets clicked together, sending jolts and painful tingles through their respective teeth and gums.  
Ignoring the pain, the toothier cat slashed at his opposition's fluffy chest with a Haunting Ravage competence before leaping out of the way, allowing his brother to have a shot at her. Sadly, the female rolled to her paws, thus causing the Diffused Aneurysm to miss, scorching where she had been mere seconds before.  
Undeterred, Valerie charged towards her. Behind the she-cat, Alain and Pablo were mirroring him.  
_Taptaptaptaptaptap_ went the little paws of the she-cat; blurring at the pace with which she performed the steps to this Abstract Tango. It threw her opponents off guard, the erratic yet somehow graceful movements, and she slashed and bit them all as she danced; inflicting heavy damage to them all at once. The trio reeled away, sporting more battle scars. She did not let up, however; repeating the bizarre dancing attack once more then proceeding to dart at each of the three in turn for a quick swipe.  
In the span of a handful of attacks, she had already cut their health dangerously low, pushing them into a wall.

It was at this point that the Puppeteer intervened; hurriedly switching modes from Automatic to Manual to deal out fortune tickets to the party.  
Instantly, the health of the three cats was replenished to a more wholesome state, and they were ready to resume combat on Automatic.  
"Hey, no fair!" Whined the female. "How did you do that?"  
"I believe that is irrelevant to the situation at hand. Are we not in the midst of combat?" Judge sensibly pointed out.  
"Oopsie. Almost forgot," giggled their opponent, covering her sheepish smile with an embarrassed paw. Alain hissed to himself with annoyance. "Scatterbrained ditz..."  
Her ears flicked in his direction, followed shortly afterwards by her scowl. "I told you already, I am not a ditz! 3:(" The she-cat cried in outrage as she charged at him.  
Valerie was there to intercept her; blasting her back with a well-timed Aneurysm to the chest. She went down with a howl.  
The once host of Japhet regarded both of his fellow felines in turn. "We should drag this skirmish to a close soon. The Batter is, no doubt, growing impatient."  
Judge nodded his concurrence. "Indeed. We will take heed of your wise words, my dearest brother, and bring this tussle to an abrupt halt."  
"So much the better," growled Alain.

During their quick discussion, their opponent had slowly regained her footing. She shook herself, fur fluffing back out, save for the areas matted with blood. Eyeing them warily, she backed into a crate.  
The contents shifted, immediately drawing the attention of trio. Hurriedly, she dived in, swallowing a couple of chunks of silver flesh that were stored within it. A Fortune Ticket was also consumed on accident, yet it still healed her without complication.  
"Damn it! Get her out of there or this battle will never end!" Alain's exclamation spurred Valerie to action. The librarian cat sprinted towards the crate and dived in.

Snarls and hissing immediately sounded and the object rocked violently with their tussle. A small amount of light burst from the top of the crate, the source being an Awaited Grimace. A particularly loud yowl accompanied the attack, seeing as it had poisoned her. The female was then tossed out by her scruff. She landed on her behind in a most undignified manner. Hastily, she scrabbled to her paws, painfully aware of the poison now flowing through her system. This battle would soon end.  
Alain charged towards her and she panicked, swiping the air blindly. His dodge made the attack ineffectual. Shuffling forwards quickly, the stray penetrated her guard. A Sly Palpitate was delivered before she could properly brace herself, thus, the dancing female was sent tumbling head over heels from the sheer force of it.  
Pablo sent her flying abruptly back towards Alain, like a fluffy shuttlecock, with an Unknown Sclerosis.  
With a nasty smirk, the stray slashed at the female's stomach as she flew past and hit a mannequin.  
She did not move.  
They had won this battle.

The brothers heaved twin sighs of relief. Alain just gave a disdainful sniff. "It appears you weren't so tough after all."  
Jerkily sitting up on her hunches, the female shot the trio a hurt look. "That's not very nice..." She mewed, gingerly licking some blood from her pelt. She whimpered when her tongue touched a particularly sore gash.  
"Her mental stability may be within doubt, but her prowess in the arts of combat etiquette is not." Mused Pablo. "What might such a creature as yourself be named?"  
A pause in the female's cleanup. She grinned, teeth bloodied from both the grooming and the battle. "So modest. So fancy. Does he always talk so fancy?"  
"He also has an imaginary friend." Alain drawled. He received a withering look from the guardian. The female seemed elated at the news. "Really? Me too! :3" Suddenly remembering Pablo's earlier question, she hastily provided an answer, which quickly deviated into a brief biography. "My name is Jozlyn. I've been searching all over for my owner. This area is full of sugar. I was certain to find my owner here. :'3 Sadly she is not here."  
"Maybe you should travel with us." Valerie suggested kindly. "Me and my brother travel together often. Maybe we can find said owner?"  
A low hiss came from the zone 1 stray at this suggestion. Alain clearly harboured a grudge at being made a fool of.

Pablo tilted his head upwards, talking to someone only he could see. "Player? I'm sure, without a doubt, after witnessing our friend in combat that your eagerness to have her within our side and control are overflowing."  
Jozlyn coked her head upwards to try and catch a glimpse of whatever enigma the other cat was conversing with. "Player?"  
"His imaginary friend." Alain explained. "You'll get used to it."  
"My sanity is slowly dithering under the tones that strike out of your mouth, dearest Alain." Growled Pablo. "I question how that cerebrum of yours functions, flabbing around tiresome in your cavity."  
The other cat boredly picked stray granules of sugar from out of his large teeth and licked them from his claws. "Your big words go unheard by my ears."  
Valerie glanced between the pair, exasperated. Determined to put an end to the drawn-out banter and continue their quest, he cleared his throat meaningfully. "Ahem. I'm sure the Player is very tired of this cutscene already. Can we go?"  
"Such advice is of good nature. Fair enough, Jozlyn," the Judge flashed said female a wide grin, "let us travel through this lieu together."  
"Yay!" She squealed, pouncing on the surprised guardian and nuzzling his face.  
There was a nervous laugh from the brother and a hiss of irritation from the stray.

"Oh for the love of..."

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**A/N: **I sincerely hoped that this was an enjoyable read for you guys, cuz I sure as hell had fun writing it.

And if you haven't already, play **HOME**, and extend your thanks to Felix and his team; they all worked tirelessly to create such an awesome fangame, so it is most definitely well deserved. ^v^


End file.
